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Goddess
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PostPosted: Sat Sep 05, 2009 9:21 am    Post subject: Jehovah Witnesses Reply with quote

This morning (I was actually awake and up and I had gotten up at 7.30 on a SATURDAY morning to pick my boyfriend up from work) a sweet old lady and, I assume, her granddaughter came to my house and read me a few paragraphs from the Bible and told me that God will be visiting the world shortly and that the world would be turning into a paradise for those who believed. There was genuine goodness in her heart and she was very sweet so I just couldn't be nasty to her! Anyone else and I could have argued philosophy for hours with. Damn me for having as soft-spot for old people. Anyway she gave me some literature and she said she'll be coming back to discuss.

Anyways, what methods have you or would you like to use to get rid of Jehovah Witnesses?
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aalpha
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PostPosted: Sat Sep 05, 2009 3:59 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

If your front door doesn't have a peep hole install one and when you see her standing at your door don't open it.

They do not approach people with the idea they might change *their* mind. You are going to change *yours*.

There's tons of stuff on the net about these people, unfortunately too much of it looks like it's produced by kooks who are kookier than JWs. Or it's so steeped in Christian theological scholarship only priests and other clergy can appreciated it.

The JWs have made scores if not hundreds of prophecies none of which ever came to pass. And when you ask about it, their stock reply is "We never said that" even though they said it in print and copies of it still exists.

If you know your Bible inside and out and try to refute them with scripture they simply explain that what you understand is wrong, the words you just read don't mean what they clearly said and their interpretation is correct. There is hardly a page of the Bible these people do not misinterpret.

One case in point. When Jesus was resurrected he had to demonstrate to his disciples he was flesh and bones and not a ghost or figment of their imagination.

JWs do not believe Jesus rose from the dead (i.e. a bodily resurrection) so he was deceiving the disciples for what ever convoluted reason they can come up with that reconciles in their mind the Son of God is a liar.

It's nice to be nice but you may have to be brash and tell her you are not interested in what she has to say and tell her to go away. Usually they do.
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Lamiaceae
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PostPosted: Sat Sep 05, 2009 8:36 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

The magic words are :-



'I am Roman Catholic'


This might not work so much in your case as they already have spoken to you, and normally on approaching you, you would of said this straight off, but we were being pestered by these people over a period of time, though yes they did go when they realised they weren't getting very far on that instance. They even came to us once on Christmas day... anyway, my mum had enough of them and told them she was Roman Catholic, it was if something extra had been said, they bid their fairwells, and since that day... we've not seen them since.

Reminds me of the Jasper Carrot joke, where he invites them in to his living room.

He asks them 'what now?'
They reply, 'we don't know, we've never got this far before'

There was this website I found once where you signed up your friends email addresses and they believed that when their rapture came, this website would email your friends that now might be a good time to believe...


EDIT - Found it

http://www.raptureletters.com/



It worries me that people think like this...
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Rach
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PostPosted: Sun Sep 06, 2009 2:31 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

There is a really funny sketch in Black Books with Jehovah's Witnesses. I have been trying to find it on youtube, but I can't, which is really annoying. Does anyone else remember the bit I am talking about? Can you find a link for it?
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area51newmexico
Goddess
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PostPosted: Mon Sep 07, 2009 11:46 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Why do you always think of the best responses to say after the event?

I should have said, when the Four Horsemen do come, don't worry becuase I know the tactics to get rid of them:P (I did them last night)

aalpha - unfortunately I don't know the Bible inside and out Sad Wanna join me next time she comes around?

Minty - unfortunately, again, I've already told her I wasn't religious:(
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aalpha
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PostPosted: Mon Sep 07, 2009 2:56 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Helen, my point was it doesn't matter if you know your Bible inside and out, they misinterpret every page of it anyway. If you're not a JW, your understanding is wrong.

It's too bad you can't get your hands on some orange contact lenses. Open the door with those and a maniacal grin in place and they may leave the entire neighborhood alone. Laughing Laughing
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Lamiaceae
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PostPosted: Mon Sep 07, 2009 5:52 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Uncle of my sister's husband...


Still with me?


Met my sister for the first time, by answering the door totally naked and wielding a shotgun.

Get Paul to do this next time they come round. They'll not know what to do next...

I did always wonder what would happen if I made myself look like I was really busy when they had called, ie jump in the shower, apply half a face full of shaving cream and then wrap a towel round me.
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Specter
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PostPosted: Sun Sep 27, 2009 8:28 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I happened to watch past a jehovas witness church last night when i went out to get some dinner, and I thought, wouldn't it be great to crash thier service and preach some wiccan or similar. I'd like to see how open they are to listen to other religeous ideas.
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Krymmsun
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PostPosted: Fri Oct 16, 2009 9:58 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

My father is Jehovah's Witness. I was raised on their religion. They're all so delusional it's scary and I almost pity them. There's so many contradictions in their beliefs.
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Lamiaceae
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PostPosted: Fri Oct 16, 2009 11:07 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Krymmsun wrote:

My father is Jehovah's Witness. I was raised on their religion. They're all so delusional it's scary and I almost pity them. There's so many contradictions in their beliefs.



Glad to see you were able to think for yourself, and it was you who decided you wanted to believe different.

What was it that eventually made you think 'Hang on, this isn't right'. Or was it lots of little things that all added up ?
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area51newmexico
Goddess
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PostPosted: Sat Oct 17, 2009 3:33 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Krymmsun wrote:
My father is Jehovah's Witness. I was raised on their religion. They're all so delusional it's scary and I almost pity them. There's so many contradictions in their beliefs.


You know, I've never actually met anyone who is/was Jehovah's Witness. I also don't know much about it. I'm always been really interested in other cultures and religions so I hope you don't mind if I ask a few questions about it? What are main beliefs, how is it different from other denominations, what was it like being a Jehovah's Witness?
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